The Questioner.

Today I became 30 years young *cough*, with the emphasis on the cough. It is an interesting number, a measure of spend heartbeats, and a time of recapping. Usually I don't care much about birthday's, but this time it feels like I'm starting all over again. Thinking about what you did in your life, where you came from and where one is heading as a result. Usually such an age is far away when you are young, but it's there in a blink. All the more reason of knowing that one's life is constantly changing, just like a river which isn't the same twice. For it's also a moment that I realize that one is getting better each year, more complete, less fears in your life and like a good wine is aging slowly into a subtle character. Personally I don't hold much value on counting earth years as a measure. I think ones spirit isn't bound to time, nor is it any different from the day I was born. It feels like the spirit is timeless, eternal present without pinpointing it.Back to the practical "real" world. Often I question people who say: you should stand in the real world, be realistic. That is a sentence full of fear, spoken out by people who cling to life, cling to the material because it's the only thing they can hold on to while all life fades away around them. Most people don't understand or grasp that life is changing, it re-freshes itself, it dies to give birth to new life. People who can dream are not affraid, they stand in reality just like anyone else. But they know that their spirit is eternal, everywhere and is stronger than life or physical reality, and overcomes death. One thing I learned is acceptance. Accepting things how they are, don't mix into them. Let things go, flow with the current and don't fight the current because the current will drag you down if you do. Certain wisdom emerge when you grow older, acceptance is one of them. The other is seeing things in perspective, knowing that you could not do without the people you fear or hated most, seeing that every bad thing in life that happened to you made a change in your life. it made you like you are today, more complete more educated, and more wise.It learned me also that when you retreat back from the game of life, and sit back a little to have a good overview, you'll notice that life is a silly journey. As humans we are constantly searching for adventures, competition, celebration and acknowledgment of who we are. it's interesting to see that many people are not certain who they are, they try to find their true nature and true self through many practices. People want control over their lives, they want control over anything. If there is one thing you'll never get in life, it is control. So why bother with it? go with it instead of against it. My whole life lacks definition, I'm not a security researcher, nor a security specialist. I am not a programmer, nor a